Magical Girl Lina Inverse
by Calophi
Summary: The essenses of Lina Inverse and the other Slayers have been reborn into the future. They have been called upon again to battle the dark lord Shabranigdo...Magical Girl Style!
1. Me, a sorceress? I can't be a magical g...

Episode 1: Me, a sorceress? I can't be a magical girl!  
  
** I (unfortunately) don't own Slayers or any other shows I may or may not have parodied in this fic. Heehee.  
  
AN: Hey all! I was reading some fics of the Slayers gang in high school and I got this amazing idea of my own. I've wanted to do a sillier fic to contrast the more serious one I've been doing and I think this one will do nicely. It would be G rated but I upped it because I might have some language and such in here. I know I usually put in HTML and stuff but the compy I'm at right now doesn't save those right. ^_^;; Oh well, text only will have to do for now. Anyway, let me know if you enjoy this. ^_^  
  
*********************  
  
Lina Yamada quickly brushed through her fiery auburn hair and flashed a smile into her mirror. 'Ahhh! It's not all over the place today!' she thought happily, and she gracefully danced out of her room grabbing her backpack and slinging it over her shoulder as she descended a flight of stairs. "Hey sis, what's for breakfast?" she called out, tossing her backpack on the floor and padding her way to the dining room table.  
  
"Pancakes and eggs!" her sister called back from the kitchen. "They're almost ready!"  
  
"'Kay!" Lina acknowledged, and plunked herself down in a chair. She looked up at the clock hanging on the wall in front of her and smiled. There was plenty of time for her to eat and be on her way out. That was saying a lot; Lina sure liked to eat! Her sister didn't know where her appetite came from and never failed to mention that whenever they shared a meal. Sure enough, it was mentioned again today soon after the food was placed on the table.  
  
"Kripes, Lina, how do you fit all that stuff into that skinny body of yours?"  
  
"I can't help it if I'm starving, Luna," she replied as she shoveled food down her throat.  
  
"You're starving all day, every day, Lina," Luna sighed as she delicately cut her own pancakes into manageable pieces. "You're gonna get fat if you keep this up."  
  
"Will not," she mumbled, finishing the last of her food and gulping down a glass of milk. "Mmm, that really hit the spot. And I've still got plenty of time to get Gourry and go to school!" Lina shoved her chair back and ran to the door, backpack in hand. "See-ya, Luna!" she called out as she slipped her feet into her shoes and walked outside. As she passed the bushes that grew alongside of her driveway, a pair of slanted blue eyes could be seen glowing out from underneath them, watching Lina intently...  
  
*********************  
  
Lina took a deep breath as she walked down the street towards her friend's house. She was feeling fine today; she loved being on time for school and she had saved enough time to account for the awful ordeal that would surely take place at Gourry's house today. If she was late for school she'd miss part of her Mythology class, and that was her favorite class. She had a notion that most people hated it, but she soaked up the information like a sponge. She treated most information in a similar manner, actually, but especially myths and legends.  
  
She walked up the pathway and knocked on a door to an average-looking house. A young blonde woman answered. "Good-morning, Lina-san! I tried to get Gourry up, but..."  
  
Lina's face darkened. "Step aside, Izawa-san," she said seriously. "I'll take care of this..."  
  
"H...hai..." Gourry's mom murmured as she watched Lina stomp up the steps to Gourry's room. "Such a strange girl..."  
  
Lina kicked open the door to Gourry's room and waited for her eyes to adjust to the darkness. She saw Gourry asleep in his bed; he was tangled up in his sheets and his long blonde hair was a mess. With a sigh Lina threw open the curtains and Gourry rolled over to face away from the sunlight.  
  
"Gourry," Lina said softly tapping him. No response. She pushed on his shoulder. "Gourry!" she said louder. He curled up tighter, so she shook him violently and screamed in his ear. "GOURRY YOU JELLYFISH FOR BRAINS! GET YOUR BUTT OUT OF BED RIGHT THIS INSTANT!"  
  
Gourry, of course, woke up, his head whirling. "Ow, Lina! Whatcha do that for?"  
  
"I will NOT be late to school because of your laziness! Out of bed! Out! Out!" Gourry obediently got out of bed and began dragging himself to the bathroom. "Faster! Faster!" Lina shouted. "Comb your hair! Brush your teeth! Put on your uniform! Get your backpack!" she ranted, waving her arms this way and that. Gourry rushed to comply lest Lina hit him again. She shoved him down the stairs. "Eat your breakfast. Quickly now! Come on come on come on!" She paused for a moment to flash a smile at Gourry's mom and got back to harping Gourry. "Put on your shoes! Let's go! We don't have all day!" And with that, she pushed grabbed Gourry's hand and pulled him out the door.  
  
"Lina!" Gourry panted, "Do we really have to run? We'd get there in time if we walked!"  
  
"Shut up, you overgrown jellyfish! I wanna get there and be in my seat before the bell rings."  
  
"But Lina, I'm sleepy! Linaaaaaa!"  
  
As Lina zoomed past an empty alleyway with Gourry flying behind her, the same glowing blue eyes peered out at. "Yes," a female voice sounded. "She is the one..."  
  
********************* ---big scene change! WAI!  
  
Lina stretched her arms out wide as she left the school building. What a wonderful day she had! In mythology class she had gotten back her test on the legendary Dark Star weapons and had gotten an A plus, and her homework in her history class was perfect. Poor Gourry had fallen asleep in Arithmetic and had gotten a detention, so she had to walk home by herself.  
  
Suddenly, Lina got the feeling that she was being watched. She slowed down her walk and looked cautiously all around her, noticing a pair of glowing blue eyes peering out from underneath a car. "H-hey!" she stammered as the eyes disappeared from their position and reappeared right in front of her.  
  
"Ooo, a baby blue dragon! What are you doing here, girl?" she cooed to the creature in front of her, scratching it's head and under it's chin.  
  
The dragon allowed this, her eyes closing. "Mmm, that feels nice...Hey hey hey! Waitaminute!" Lina jumped back as the little dragon shook out her wings and stared at Lina inquisitively. "You're not surprised to see me?" it asked.  
  
Lina shook her head. "Not really, though I'm not sure why I don't...I've never seen a baby dragon before...or any dragon, for that matter. In fact, I didn't know they existed."  
  
"I'm not a baby, dearie; just a miniature," the dragon said to the red- haired girl crouching before her. "My name is Aqua, and my mission was to find you. The dark lord Shabranigdo has been reborn, and-"  
  
"Hold on a second here! Shabranigdo is a myth! He isn't real! And why did you want me? And how come no one else cares that a dragon is sitting here on the sidewalk?" That last question came up as she looked about and realized that no one was paying attention to what should have been a side show.  
  
"Look hon, Shabranigdo is real, and he's back, and you're the only one who can stop him." She paused, and as an added side note she added, "I'm spelled so that the average person sees me as a tanuki."  
  
"Great," Lina muttered. "People see me sitting here talking to a raccoon- dog. Lovely. So," she said in a normal voice, "what exactly do you think I can do against a reborn dark lord, anyway?"  
  
"You're accepting this rather readily; I'm surprised. Most people in your situation...wouldn't."  
  
"Right now I see a talking blue dragon sitting in front of me. I figure that if I'm going insane, I may as well go full out."  
  
"Your logic is infallible, as always," Aqua said, chuckling. She caught Lina's confused look. "Lina Yamada, you are the reincarnation of the famous Lina Inverse! Dragon Spooker and Sorcery Genuis! You must defeat Shabranigdo once again!"  
  
"Uh huh. And how do you propose I do that?"  
  
"You merely need to transform into your previous self, Lina. Your magical abilities and skills are locked inside of yourself, and you must transform in order to use your latent talents."  
  
Lina backed away, frightened. "Oohhhh no, I'm not being no magical girl. No way. Uh uh. I can't. I'm not stupid and I love school and I'm not a klutz. Not only will I not be a magical girl, I'm also the wrong type of person for the job. You sure you don't want Gourry instead? He'd be perfect!"  
  
Aqua chose to ignore her remark. She shimmered a blue aura and a black headband appeared in Lina's hands. "Put that on, Yamada-san," the dragon ordered. "To gain access to your previous self, you wear the headband and say, "Magical Sorceress Power Transform!""  
  
"Ugh, that sounds so...gay," Lina scoffed, but she put the headband on. At least it looked nice with her grayscale uniform, and she had intended to buy one like it to keep her unruly bangs from out of her face. She felt a strange sensation tingle through her. This was all so weird. She had learned about Lina Inverse and Shabranigdo in mythology, but had never thought that they had any factual basis. She STILL didn't think so. She stood. "Can I go now?"  
  
The dragon smiled knowingly. "Yes. And don't forget to take a peek in that alley over there." And with that, the dragon vanished.  
  
*********************  
  
"Hm..." Lina murmured, "It couldn't hurt just to take a look, could it?" Lina wandered over to the alley and gasped at what she saw. A creature stood over a distressed woman, and...it was on fire! A creature made of fire torturing a helpless girl. Lina couldn't tolerate it. Before she could think better of herself she shouted 'MAGICAL SORCERESS POWER TRANSFORM!" She was engulfed in a red light and emerged wearing a fancy cape, boots, and gloves, among other things. Her school uniform was gone. "At least I didn't have a naked transformation," she mumbled as she dashed into the alley. The creature looked up at her with it's eyes narrowed.  
  
"Ooo! Someone else for me to play with!" it hissed and left the other woman trembling against the brick wall.  
  
"Oh, you wanna play, do you?" Lina mused, folding her arms. "Do you know who I am?"  
  
"It makes no difference to me who you are, little girl," it said, advancing on Lina.  
  
"I am the beautiful sorcery genius, Lina Inverse!" Lina announced anyway, the words flowing naturally from her tongue. She glared at the fire creature. "And I just LOVE playing with fire."  
  
"You can't fool me, mortal!" it cackled. "Lina Inverse is dead! A little girl like you can't stop me!"  
  
"Hm. Don't be so sure, hot stuff." Lina could feel magical energy swirling all around her. Her instincts took over, and she molded the energy in her hands. "Freeze Arrow!" she cried, and a arrow of ice sprang from her hands and hit the fire creature dead on. It screamed with pain as the ice spread from the arrow to cover it's entire body. It was soon encased in a giant ice cube. Lina casually walked over to it and kicked it; the ice shattered into billions of pieces and started to melt, taking the fire creature with it.  
  
"Aww, man!" she complained. "That was WAY too easy! Magical girls aren't supposed to have an easy first fight! I feel so unsatisfied!" She leaned down towards the frightened woman and smiled. "You're welcome!" The poor girl got up and managed to stammer a thanks before stumbling out of the alley. Lina looked around. "Now what? I guess I had better go home." She started to leave the alley when she realized something very important.  
  
"I'm still wearing the Inverse costume! Hey, Aqua? Where are you? How do I de-transform? Aqua? Come on, don't leave me like this! I'm starving! AQUUAAAAAA!!!!!"  
  
[End of Episode One!]  
  
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AN: That was long, ne? I wanted to put all of the first episode in one chapter so you could get a good feel for what I want to do. If you guys like this I'll write more episodes like this, but it'll take a while because each episode is so long. I tried to break this one up into sections, at least. Please please PLEASE review this and tell me how you like it! And don't worry that so far only Lina and Gourry are in it; the rest will come if I write more, I assure you! ^_^ 


	2. What!? Since when did HE get skills?

Episode 2: What!? Since when did HE get skills?  
  
** Slayers...not mine...::sniffle::  
  
Author's notes will be on the bottom!  
  
*********************  
  
"Source of all power...crimson fire burning bright...FLARE ARROW!"  
  
Lina Inverse, also known in this world as Lina Yamada, stood with her hands on her hips and a wide grin on her face three forms in front of her quickly burned to a crisp. "Ha! That'll teach you to mess with the world's most powerful and beautiful sorcery genius, Lina Inverse!" she mocked triumphantly, the dancing flames flickering in her ruby red eyes. Being Lina Inverse was kinda fun. Rumors of her "return" were flying about her little suburbian town, and she smiled whenever she heard someone refer to her as the Dramatta, even though they were unaware that it was Yamada they were talking about. Being a normal girl was so...boring. She hadn't liked the idea of being a magical girl at first, but these past few weeks had proved very fulfilling for her. She had worried a few times that she was out of character, but Aqua had reassured her that she was so much like the former Lina Inverse that it was impossible for her to be out of character. Ever.  
  
Touching her hand to the pitch black headband she wore, Lina closed her eyes and concentrated. Her Inverse costume shimmered into non-existance and she sauntered away from the scene of the crime: another alleyway. Geeze, these monster-types really seemed to like alleys, though it was lucky for her since it was much easier to hide her identity this way. Only L-Sama knew what jerks would follow her around, trying to get the scoop on the famous, talented (and not to mention, supposed-to-be-dead-for-centuries) Lina Inverse.  
  
'Heh, here I am, talking about L-Sama again,' she thought. She was slipping into more and more habits lately that seemed familiar but she had never done before, such as referring to the Gods and Mazoku as if they were still around. And they had to still be around, or else her spells wouldn't work. She supposed it was because of the books she had gotten from the library; old, dusty texts that were placed on the back shelves. The one she was going through now was Lina's biography, which had been deemed a work of fiction. She couldn't blame people really; her life had been pretty outrageous. Yamada herself didn't actually remember anything that happened, and she was thankful for it. Lina Inverse had a hard life, and to remember stuff like that...would really suck.   
  
*****************  
  
After school the next day, Lina found herself reading an ancient book while sitting on an old wooden swing that hung on her back porch. Aqua was curled up next to the girl, her blue scales sparkling under the sunlight. Lina looked engrossed in the book, but she suddenly shut it and leaned back into the swing with a sigh. Aqua lifted her head and gave Lina a quizzical look. "What's wrong, dear?"  
  
"Well," she started, "I'm not exactly sure what's going on around here. I mean, I kill monsters and that's all fun and stuff, but what's the big picture?"  
  
"Okay, you deserve to know. You're the one fighting this war now, after all. You remember that Lina Inverse managed to defeat two of the seven pieces of Shabrinigdo?" Lina nodded; she had just finished the section in which Lina used the Giga Slave for the first time. "A third piece has somehow been resurrected, and now Shabrinigdo is searching for the last four pieces of himself. The strange creatures you've been fighting lately are looking for those pieces. It's your job to find them first and figure out a way to destroy them without unleashing the demon captured within."  
  
"Let me guess," Lina said, speaking slowly, "somehow, all four of those pieces are somewhere within this very town, and they're all being carried by innocent people that are none the wiser of their dire situation."  
  
Aqua shifted uncomfortably. "Something like that."  
  
Lina sighed. "These stories are so predictable. So," she said, changing the subject, "how am I supposed to defeat Shabrinigdo by myself? Isn't that a little...impossible?"  
  
"Don't you worry about that; another part of your mission is to find the essenses of the other Slayers. They will be able to help you."  
  
"How many of them are there?"  
  
"I...don't know."  
  
"How will I find them?"  
  
"...Uhhh..."  
  
"There won't be a little girl from the future who will brainwash my family and claim to be my child and annoy the living hell out of me, will there?"  
  
"...No. And stop asking me all these questions! There's no way for me to know how many of the Slayers have had their powers transferred to the people of this generation, and knowing who they are will be an instinct when I see them, though it's not infallible..." Aqua blushed.  
  
"What? You test that once?" Lina said jokingly, nudging Aqua in the flank.  
  
"Well...once I found a girl who I thought was Lina Inverse..." she trailed off, embarassed.  
  
"And?"  
  
"And...she turned out to be Luna Inverse, Lina's sister...to say the least, that was NOT a good day for me."  
  
Lina tried to hold back her laughter, but it came out in a big gaffaw leaving Aqua looking mighty chagrined. Suddenly Lina's laughter stopped as the girl gained a serious expression. "Did you feel that?"  
  
The dragon nodded slowly. "I did indeed."  
  
"ALL RIGHT!" Lina shouted, jumping from the swing and causing it to swing back and forth so violently that Aqua tumbled off. She hopped over the backyard fence and ran head first into danger, not hearing Aqua's pleas for her to wait.  
  
*****************  
  
"Guess I'll have to use something a bit more powerful," Lina said as she staggered to her feet and wiped some blood from her mouth with the back of her hand. Before her stood some sort of troll-rhinocerous hybrid - a disgusting humanoid creature with thick legs and a huge nose from which a horn protruded. He had ransacked a cabin on the outskirts of town looking for the fourth piece of Shabrinigdo, but he soon found that the magical force that had led him to that location was nothing but a Bezerk Knife. His fight with Lina had lasted for about twenty minutes thus far and none of Lina's spells had any effect. However, his charging attacks had a large and not-good effect on the petite sorceress.  
  
The rhino-troll beast cackled at her. "Let's see you try, little girl!" he roared. "Let's see how weak Lina Inverse has become after centuries of rotting in her grave!"  
  
Lina's eyes twinkled. "You're gonna regret saying that." She raised her arm up and behind her head, concentrating her magical energy into her hand. An orange glow appeared there - small at first, but it grew quickly. Her hair and cape whipped around with the magical energy she was building up, and she threw her arm in front of her as hard as she could. "FIREBALL!" she shouted; the force of the spell kicked back at her a little - Lina Yamada was not used to weilding such power. She looked on in wonder as the gigantic ball of fire smashed into it's target, blowing up the opposite wall of the cabin and setting fire to the inside. "YEEEESS! WHOO!" she squealed. "Got 'im! I am so great! I am so great!" she began to chant, marching around the room.  
  
[BOOM!]  
  
[THUD!]  
  
A burst of energy came back at Lina, sending her crashing into the wall behind her. The flames grew brighter as they began climbing the walls and eating at the ceiling, and a shadow appeared at the hole where the fireball hit. Lina squinted and tried to climb to her feet but immediately sunk to the foor again with a wimper; she had twisted her knee. The rhino-troll stepped back into the cabin while brushing bits of dirt and ash from his body. "That all ya got?" he mocked. "I didn't know the great Lina Inverse could be downed by a simple energy wave. How pathetic!" He stepped towards her as she shivered with fear.  
  
'Now what can I do? I used up my energy making that fireball, and...and I can't get up...' just to test this theory she pushed herself up, only to feel excruciating pain in her knee and fall onto the ground again. The troll was coming closer and closer, deliberately slow so that she would suffer longer. Behind him the roof collapsed thankfully letting some of the smoke flow outside. He paid it no heed and continued his advance upon the firey-haired sorceress, until...  
  
[SPLUT!]  
  
[insert cool guitar riff here]  
  
"A...a jellyfish?" Lina sputtered, looking a the mass of goo that now lay between her and the beast.  
  
"Where the hell did that come from?!" the troll roared, temporarily distracted from Lina. The girl searched around for the source of the jellyfish until her eyes rested upon a figure standing upon the roof, just at the edge where it had collapsed. He had long flowing hair and wore a black tuxedo and a top hat. Her eyes turned to stars and she clasped her hands in front of her with joy. "Tuxedo Gourry!"  
  
"Don't dispair, Lina! Believe in yourself with all your heart, and you shall always triumph over the evils that now fill this world!"  
  
The troll stood there dazed and Lina sighed happily, then something in her snapped and she shook her head fiercely. She wasn't going to allow herself to play THAT stupid game. "Gourry? Whaddya doing here?"  
  
Gourry Izawa waved. "Hi Lina! It's me!"  
  
"I know it's you, baka! What are you doing here?"  
  
"I followed you. I was bored." He looked around. "How'd this nice cabin catch on fire? Was it...was it a pickle?"  
  
"Get out of here, jellyfish for brains! You'll get yourself hurt!" She stood and took a step foward, and collapsed. "I...itai..."  
  
The troll snapped out of his confusion. "No need to worry about him after all!" he laughed as he turned back to the sorceress. "You are a fool, Lina Inverse, for challenging the minions of Lord Shabrinigdo! Now you shall be destroyed!"  
  
Gourry's eyes narrowed; his expression was fierce. "This is it." From inside his cape, he pulled out a small sword and held it high in the air. "MAGICAL SWORDSMAN POWER TRANSFORM!" With a twinkle and a small "poof", his tuxedo was gone and in it's place was a blue outfit with black armor. The small sword turned into a very large one, and it was glowing with power. "HIIYAAAAA!"  
  
Gourry somersaulted in the air and straightened out, bringing his sword down with a nasty swipe and split the troll in half. It barely had time to turn around and look at the blonde swordsman in horror. Gourry landed neatly as the beast crumbled into ashes, and he sheathed his sword easily. Lina looked on, quite surprised, as Gourry's costume shimmered out and left him wearing a pair of blue jeans and a black t-shirt.  
  
"You...you're one of the Slayers? You can transform?"  
  
"Huh?"  
  
"You! Transformed! And called yourself Gourry Gabriev!"  
  
"I did? But that's not my name!"  
  
"That's the name of the Slayer you just transformed into."  
  
"I transformed?"  
  
"YES!" Lina saw the hilt of the minature sword in Gourry's pocket and pulled it out. "Where'd you get this?" she asked, holding it in front of his face. He plucked it from her fingers and stared at it, his face contorted as if he was in deep thought. Then his face brightened.  
  
"Oh, I know!"  
  
"Where?"  
  
"I forget!"  
  
Lina smacked herself in the forehead. "I should have expected that," she muttered. She touched her headband and and transformed back into her normal clothes, then almost tried to get up again when she remembered that she couldn't. "Uh, Gourry?"  
  
"Yeah?"  
  
"Could...could you help me get home? I sorta can't walk...or stand for that matter..."  
  
"Sure, Lina. I'm your protector, after all." He crouched down facing away from her, and she crawled onto his back. He stood and held onto her legs and she wrapped her arms around his neck.  
  
"What was that, Gourry?"  
  
"I'm your protector," he repeated as he carefully picked his way through the still burning cabin. "I never really thought about it until now, but it feels really natural for me to be with you and guard you." Lina flushed and lay her head down on his back. He twisted his head to try to look at her. "You alright, Lina? You feel hot. Do you need a doctor?"  
  
Lina shook her head, still blushing. "No, I'm fine...just help me get home, okay?"  
  
"Whatever you want!" he said cheerfully. He hefted her up a bit to keep her from slipping, smiling slightly when he felt her arms tighten around his neck, and began walking home.  
  
*****************  
  
Authors Notes! Whoo! You miss me? Huh? Did ya? This took a long time to write, I know. I'm sorry.  
  
Many thanks to my buddy Conrad for the Tuxedo Gourry idea as well as the jellyfish he threw. If anyone else has any ideas please go to my member page and use the email address there; wouldn't want any spoilers in the reviews now would we? I already know all the characters I intend to use and (for the most part) their roles and when they will be introduced. However there's still some magical girl quirks that I'm sure I'm missing and having those pointed out would be supah keen. This might turn out to be...long. Very long. Hope it's worth it for you guys.  
  
Read and review! The only reason this is up and not my other ficcie, Dragon Dolor, is because I got more reviews for one chapter of this than I did for four chapters of Dragon Dolor. I'm going to be working on that now, hopefully. It's not silly like this one but I like it better than this one. Maybe because I can write the chapters shorter. ^_^ I'm so lazy! 


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